some talks, some emotions, some expressions & some silence

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Sunday, 29 November 2009

SEARCH FOR THE SECRET



PART I
Walking with the limbs of lamb,
tired tumbling but no more inert,
through the woods and over the waters
he touched the soil unknown
couldn’t defy destiny’s decree.

Unexperienced, unexpected, unfamiliar, untried
was his body and soul ,his thoughts and emotions.
The waves in nature resonating through him,
like the narrow meandering waters,
like the valley between the knolls,
like the curves of fronds and flowers.

Not sure of the jobs still left,
not aware of the reason to do them,
an epitome of innocence and ignorance.

Had run many races,
it ain’t his attempt to walk.
And with the dawn of the new day,
perceiving the jobs undone,
begun his hunt for the reason
through the woods and over the waters.

Thousand drops blood and miles long walk,
pounds of work and days ending fatigued.
Asked the western moon and the eastern sun
Asked the sky above and the soil below.

Aching neck bent down, paining eyes drowsed.
Stunned by the bright silver flash of north,
he stood as an antique idol ,
to bless the world with light.

Moving his limbs through the waters,
he left his pain alone, drowned.
The dark became the light of life,
wounds healed in the golden rain of moon.
The tears on his face burning in hopeless hope,
hope, down a path long and deep and dark.

The northern winds, the northern waters,
were tough for him to search his hope.
The grey secret shadows of twilight
watching him with their secret eyes
as he could hear silent whispers
that were coming and fading away.

He smelled the fragrance far away
but saw nothing in the fog
felt the air, cold and humid.
as dark it was in heaven’s land.

he wished to see the northern light
but not always, as he closed his eyes
his dry throat asked for water and
as he touched the water, he touched the pain.

PART II
No moment to cherish, hours running in seconds,
distance counted in miles but the pace degrading.
at the deepest and the darkest, a dream did lie,
as the air of hope touched him, calling him.

And the goal so far, seemed to be near
through the aura,he saw the aurora
avenging on dark, the light of life;
afraid to take a step ahead,even a step back.

Braving the rays, ready to march ahead,
But then he stopped; heard something,
A voice through his soul, reverberating,
from the east it came,towards the west it went.

No wide waters, no broken bridges
no light to defend,easy efforts to make.
Was the darkness fake or illusion of his thoughts?
the spirit of light or the voice so divine.

Couldn’t cognite the coherent coexistence,
he followed the divine words,for his search,
and the air around with altering arrays,
escorting him on his long, lonely pilgrimage.

Satanic soul shattered by sacred sounds
succeeded by a new-born, innocent and true
sudden changes, never minor; he wondered,
“Who had been walking on the path of light?”

April-hearted, as he moved along the green
relishing the taste of fresh fragrances,
trying to know, if the birds meant him,
feeling the touch of eternity in every touch of him.

And after a long night, in the twilight, he saw
an angel with an aureole behind, as in dreams
but was a maiden singing the divine song,
spelling on him the feeling of love,
love, the eternal truth of life.

PART III
Was he an evil soul or a soul too divine?
Not even moved by the spell so divine.
The astonished angel scanned him through
Found his eyes illusioned, by a power enigmatic.

“What did you see on the way towards me?”
Shaking was her voice, cold was her soul.
“Nothing but the rays of north,the….”
And soon he was amidst the waters, stretched apart.

The black waters killed his thirst
The insane winds held his mind hostage
The mysterious moonlight kidnapped his soul
As the dark started commanding, he could see nothing.

And as the angel was pacing with the sail,
He saw death waiting for him at the shore.
Then soon he asked her to stop and return.

“You are wrong, its the light, the northern light.
The light that rules darkness, rules me,
you are blessed to have seen it, i am not.
Let me take you there, where it awaits with life
And let it forgive the curse laid on me.”

Like a pirate on an unknown voyage,
He sniffed the wealth at the northern shore
As he saw only raw stones, priceless to value
Again he said to stop and return, back to the dark.

When the noise behind struck his ears
He looked back and saw his people coming.
“There, see, my people,they are coming for me.”
How could she stop? The mighty fleet of death was behind them.

Slowly as her image faded
The light reminded him what he forgot.
The air was changing and so was he
No longer he saw priceless stones but shining gems.

Again he heard in a low, sweet tone…..
“You are the truth and so are your brothers.
You saw me but they didn’t bother
Like you, they were caught in fake eternity
Caught in the clouds of dark, lost their sanity
The cursed soul, now is a part of me
And that you never thank her, is the curse on thee.
Let your heart speak the language of love
Understood by me, my friends on earth and the flying dove.”

IF

If I see you in my hidden prayers
If I promise to be with you in eternity
If I admire you every dawn I live
If I wish to see you in my dreams
If your tears are as precious as my smile
If your smile is as cherished as my soul
If your melancholy is my hatred
If your rejoice is my love
If you fight for what you wish
And If I be with you till I'm slain
If anyday I dont wake up
I would wish the most to see you
For if I'm slain its only for you
For if I see you not, my dreams will
And then if I say how much I know you
And then if I say how much I understand you
And then if I say how much I trust you
And then if I say how much I admire you
And then if I say how much I love you
Would you come to me and be my best friend?

Tuesday, 24 November 2009

2:52 AM

Shabnam aaj gaa rahi hai
Alfaz kam hai par matlab zyada
Boondon se baat kar raha hai man
Shayad tanhayi ka intezaar hai
Ya fir ek muktasar mohabbat ka
Zindagi kaat raha hai zakhmi dil
Kisi sans ki aarzoo se bhi darr hai
Aur aisi hi ek aur zindagi se
Yeh raat toh beet jayegi jaldi
Par kal shayad ek ittefaq hai.

Friday, 20 November 2009

Gtalk - 2:45 AM

Am I a human or I am just prejudiced to think myself as one?

2:39AM

Feasting on my left over emotions
Surrendering to the plight of my mind
My dreams want to get laid,
Sleep with the darkness
Till the dawn brings the veil of light.

Thursday, 12 November 2009

Silently Screaming

I wrote this poem for a competition on allpoetry.com and the title was provided beforehand.

I was walking along the lanes of my parish
A sunny day, a warm wind over the fields
The green paddy was ready to ripe
And a solitary soul ready to reap
As I approached her, to see her work
With a smile I did greet but
I got none in return of it.
Wondering how such an angel
Could ever defy a silent smile,
The aura screamed in my ears
And a sweet silence prevailed.
She was untouched, but I was moved
So much of grief was buried inside
Not even a scream could take it away.
In the silence was lost the rush of blood
In the silence was lost a lonely heart
In the silence was lost a voice unknown
There was a scream that I could hear
And in the silence I was absorbed.

Tuesday, 10 November 2009

Romancing the rains


I don’t know why I am so much attached to rains. Probably because I never got a rainy day off in school, probably I love playing football then, probably my soul needs to clean up regularly and probably it loves romancing the rains, probably I was never scared to slip off the road, probably I never made a fuss about the mud, probably I had clothes enough to wear the next day to office, probably my favourite word is petrichor.

I was in office till 8 PM. I knew it was raining outside since the noon and just wished that it remains when I get out of the building and walk towards my home. I was not alone. All I had was a John Players, a Provogue, a Lee, a Nokia, an Apple, a Bose, a Reebok, an Adidas, a VIP, and another VIP. I just wished I could throw all of them away and free my naked body to the rains, touch my soul, pierce through my heart and blow my mind away. Unfortunately, I was not the only one walking on the road. There were street lights too staring at me, shining bright on the black tar. All the sounds were so clear, the droplets bouncing on the lane and cracking, the stream of water flowing, tensed and anxious human talks, a folk song in a shop etc. Like an idiot I was searching for the moon and all I got was the rain hitting straight on my face. I felt like something very close just touched me and vanished in thin air. Melancholic musings were troubling my soul; I could feel the cold dampness inside me. I grabbed a fag and smoked all those thoughts away. I did not want to sit somewhere inside a shade, so bought an egg roll for dinner and headed for home. My mind was blank. I was just walking and felt like going on and on till I collapse. But my promises and my dreams were pulling me back. I looked back once and felt like I have grown up a lot but it doesn’t mean that I don’t take the next step.
All this while I was alone, serenading to myself and was just strolling on the wet and dry lands like we all walk in life. All I missed was a special friend, chai and bhajiya by the roadside. I miss my mom telling me not to get wet in the rain. Sorry mom! Can’t do that.
I am home now and rest of the night I would smoke with the clouds.